EDUCATION: OUR CHILDREN’S TREASURE

BY: ROSWALD JOSEPH J. PAGUE

Kinder 2 PTA President, SY 2009-2010

It was April 2, 2006 when our daughter, ANNE RINCHEL N. PAGUE, celebrated her 4^th birthday. After that celebration, my wife and I began to think about enrolling our child to a school that had a nursery program. My wife had heard of a school somewhere in Macasandig, Cagayan de Oro, where we then enrolled our child. After a year, though, it seemed that something was lacking in our child’s education. She had memorized her ABC’s and could identify primary colors, among other things, but we felt it wasn’t enough. So we began to ask our family friends and officemates about the schools where their children were enrolled. A Ninang of our daughter told us to try LIFETIME STUDY CENTER near the St. Augustine Metropolitan Cathedral.

So, for the next school year, we enrolled our daughter to the said school with the hope and aspiration that perhaps our daughter may have a better foundation before entering the elementary grades.

Since I was always busy in the office, my wife kept track of the progress of our daughter in her studies. After just a few months in this new school, I was surprised when, as we were watching TV, my daughter started reading the 2- to 3-syllable words that were flashing on the screen. As a doting father, nothing is sweeter than hearing your child start reading and pronouncing words well. In the middle of the year, my daughter had started to count numbers up to 100 and match colors with their names. Not only that, when the school year ended, I heard my daughter memorizing a presentation for the school's Closing Program where she was one of the primary characters. Seeing how my child progressed from a young toddler when she began studying at LIFETIME, it was more than parents could ask in a school that was simple and homey. This school has proven to be a school of wonders.

Anne, in red, reciting the part of the Little Red Hen,

with (from left to right) AR Yamut doing the Dog, Martin Pareja, the Cat and Karan Magsalay, the Duck.

AR, Martin, Karan & Anne performing "The Little Red Hen" again the following school year

during the National Children's Book Day held at SM City, Cagayan de Oro.

It was only after a year of her spending Kinder 1 at Lifetime Study Center that I learned that the school was headed by a mother and daughter tandem. I was also surprise that it was a classmate of mine in college and a good friend, KHESSA LOUISE F. LLUCH, also known as Teacher Karen, who was that said daughter.

(below) Teacher Marissa balancing Anne as she steps on an ostrich egg!

Her mother, ROQUEZA M. FLORES, fondly called Teacher Marissa by the kids and parents in and outside the school, is a very approachable and motherly mentor. She is very articulate and eloquent in imparting her lessons. At one time, having left early from the office, I was also early in picking up my daughter from school. I chanced upon Teacher Marissa calling the students one by one and asking them to read the given word shown on the board. She was very patient in teaching the lessons point by point and reasonably strict in imposing discipline in class. A kid who seemed too shy to come to the front of the class is now a very confident kid after a year in the school.

I, myself, having been raised in a family of educators - my Papa and Mama, being teachers themselves in a public secondary school - know how very tedious it is to prepare the lessons everyday. How much more when your students are kids who have yet to learn their first syllables. One must be patient, selfless and have a love and passion for teaching. These little kids are the reflection of the quality of education of their school. This stage is very critical since it is where the character of the child is first discovered and developed. With the progress that I have been witnessing in my own daughter, I realized that the key to being a good mentor and role model is very simple yet uncommon: it is loving what you are doing. I have found it in my child’s mentor and second mother in school, Teacher Marissa.

I once told my wife we had made not only the right choice but the best choice because one of the best things that has happened to our daughter, Anne, is when we enrolled her at LIFETIME STUDY CENTER. I know I speak for the proud parents of our children’s school when I say that the education that the children have received there is worth more than we have paid because it has given them a lifetime of treasures.

I salute all the teachers who untiringly share their knowledge and talents to the kids. Thanks for coming into our daughter’s life. May you continue to share and touch the lives of those kids in your school.

Keep up the good work and mabuhay po kayong lahat!

Dancing the end of the school year at Grand Caprice, Lim Ket Kai Center, Cagayan de Oro City.

BOOKWORMS

In the heart of Cagayan de Oro City, a tiny pre-school called Lifetime Study Center has been in service since 1996. It has been catering to families who seek a good educational foundation for their children; a school where “lessons learned last a lifetime.”

I was the first student of its owner, Ms. Roqueza M. Flores. I have been under her wing long, long before she discovered her passion for teaching.

As her first student, I am told that I literally ate the pages of the first books I held. And for as long as I could remember, everywhere I looked, as long as she was there, books were always present: Bibles, dictionaries, romance novels, mysteries, self-help, religious & spiritual books, encyclopedias, comic books, children’s storybooks, books on all sorts of subject surrounded her house, and now, her school.

I realized that Marissa, as she likes to be called, mostly makes sense of the world through what she learns from the books she reads. Before Rhonda Byrnes authored “The Secret”, Marissa has been reading about the power of visualization and positive thinking way back in high school. She has, in her own way, been a staunch supporter of self-improvement: immersing herself and her surroundings with things and reading materials that entertain, educate, uplift and inspire. These books are what, I believe through the grace of God, helped her rise above adversity.

Being her life long student, I have acquired the same love for books, the same thirst to be educated by authors, especially those whose message is Jesus’ commandment: Love.

Indeed, the things we love are embedded into the fabric of our lives. No wonder, then, that Teacher Marissa/Khessa formulated the vision that lessons taught at her school are only those that will serve a person best and therefore last for a lifetime.

Aside from developing in her pupils the love for reading, Teacher Marissa is an advocate of effective communication without compromising the truth. She passes on to her employees, shares with the parents, and relates with the children what she has learned on communication, and rightfully demands that such healthy language (verbal and non-verbal) be used in daily interactions with the pupils and parents, and among faculty and staff of Lifetime Study Center. This has been one of her strongest assets: effective communication as taught in “How to Talk so Kids will Listen” (by Elaine Mazlish), among other sources.

All communication will reflect the truth only if the inner life is nurtured and cultivated. For as long as I can remember, Marissa, who is luckily not only my teacher but first and foremost, my Mom, has always said that “God has called each of us by name.” Despite the difficulties in her life, she has always put God first, never compromising the values of integrity, honesty and truth even at the expense of her "public image". One of her favorite spiritual quotes is “God is the author of our lives”. And indeed, because she has invoked God in bad times and always credited God for the successes, God has led her to seek out understanding the world and herself, and has given her the courage to be where she is right now.

I believe that her search for authenticity (as evidenced by her being a student of Philosophy) and her strong yet quiet faith in God have led her to enthusiastically and fearlessly share her love in the joy of learning and all it entails, not only to me but to everyone whom she encounters.

And to those who know her, they would agree that because my Mom wears her heart on her sleeve, conversations and lessons shared stay for a long time, if not a lifetime.

My siblings and I are fortunate to have our Mom as our Mom.

I am lucky to have been the first student of my God-loving, truth-seeking, bookworm teacher; the mother who proudly shares that her baby ate the first books she held.

Khessa Louise F. Lluch

January 26, 2010

By Sabrina

My interest in learning and my general curiosity at the world and how it worked began when I was very little. I think my parents considered me a very precocious child and so did my teachers. I went to Preschool but I don’t really remember that time very much. What I remember about my learning experience when I was a child was when I started Kindergarten. I really liked Kindergarten; we were a small community so everyone knew each other’s names and treated each other as more than just classmates but really good friends. Even the parents formed a little community and I’m pretty sure they still meet every once in a while to catch up.

The core of my experiences in Kindergarten was my teacher, Teacher Khessa. She was what made everyone in that school love to learn; she just made it so much fun and so easy to understand. She made the school not just an academe, but a place where learning, friendship and just a lot of joy could coincide without a lot of restricting rules. She basically just wanted us to respect one another and enjoy as much as we could in learning the things that she taught us.

My friends and I sometimes visit Teacher Khessa at her school to talk and catch up on things and I see her with her students and I remember how I used to be in their shoes. I see their eyes light up in wonder at the books that she reads to them and the lessons that they gain from her and I think, I was just like them once! Teacher Khessa has become such an inspiration for so many people, especially her students. Because of her, they realize at such an early age that continuous learning is the key to success and to becoming the best person they can be.

I gained a lot of things when I was at her school: very good friends, an insatiable thirst for learning, and a teacher who has never stopped leading me the right way. It has been more than 10 years since I was under her tutelage at her school, but I know that I will never stop being her student.

LSC Class '98, LSC Pioneers!

A Singular Woman

I first knew Mrs. Ma. Corazon S. del Fierro in 1979 when I enrolled my eldest daughter, Karen, as a nursery student at Little Schoolhouse. She was the owner of the school and at the same time the teacher of my daughter. She founded Little Schoolhouse in 1975 and at that time, it was really little!

One of the most unforgettable incidents of that time was when due to a miscommunication on who was to fetch my child, nobody fetched her at all. A little past noon, there was Mrs. del Fierro at our doorstep with my daughter. I was so impressed that she personally brought my child home. Due to this incident, though, my daughter would not allow me to be out of her sight when she was in school. So, there I was, from start to finish at the window of her classroom to offer assurance that never would she be forgotten again.

This time outside Mrs. del Fierro’s classroom window was a learning experience for me. Many of the things that she did with her students then, I do now as a teacher. Most notable is the one-on-one relationship she developed with each child and the big part that books played in the curriculum. If memory serves me right, not a day went by when a story wasn’t read to the students.

One of Mrs. del Fierro’s talents, I believe, is the ability to detect potential teachers. When Karen was in Grade 2, Mrs. del Fierro asked me if I had finished studying. I was to graduate that March 1984. It so happened that she urgently needed a substitute teacher the January before I was to graduate and she contacted me to see if I was interested. I was and that was the start of my teaching career. I know I made a lot of mistakes then but Mrs. del Fierro was very patient and gave me time to get my bearing and improve. I’m sure many teaching careers were started by Mrs. del Fierro – the excellent teachers in Corpus Christi Grade School is proof of that. In the 70’s and early 80’s, teaching was not that popular but Mrs. del Fierro was such an outstanding example of one that many saw the nobility of teaching through her.

The fulfilment I get from seeing students develop their potentials and bloom wouldn’t have been possible if Mrs. del Fierro did not see my potential for teaching. Had she not invited me to be with Little Schoolhouse, which eventually became Corpus Christi School, where I stayed for twelve years, I wouldn’t be where I am today.

I am now a school owner, and still teaching, and many of the things that I have implemented in my school - in the way I deal with my employees and parents, for example, I have learned from observing Mrs. del Fierro in action. I will be forever grateful for her making allowances in letting me bring my son, Mikku, who was three years old when I joined Little Schoolhouse, and then my youngest daughter, Steffi, four years later, to school because I was the kind of parent who didn’t want to leave my children with caregivers.

A very important lesson I have also learned from her is that there is room for everyone at the top. When I opened my own preschool, Lifetime Study Center, in 1996, Mrs. del Fierro remained supportive.

Mrs. del Fierro is one of the most unselfish persons I know. She not only gives moral and spiritual support to people in her employ and those she comes in contact with but I know that she contributes to many worthwhile causes and worthy recipients in the community. These many activities, I know, go unnoticed because she prefers to do things without calling attention to herself.

Thoughtfulness, tact, generosity, an abiding belief in the goodness of people, the value of service and a deep faith in the Lord - these are just some of the things that I have seen Mrs. del Fierro embody and having been touched by her life, my life has also been enriched. Mrs. Ma. Corazon S. del Fierro may not have intentionally set out to be my mentor, but that was what she was to me and I am very, very grateful.

My Kinder 1 Morning Class the very first year I started my teaching career.

The Kinder 1 Afternoon Class of that same most memorable year.

The Brain and Playing the Piano

My mother came from a time when it was de rigueur for girls to learn to play a musical instrument. So, despite being indifferent to and having no talent for the instrument, starting when I was around 7 years old and for the next 5 to 6 years, I had piano lessons at Zamora Music School.

It is a tribute to my piano teacher, the inestimable Mrs. Terry Zamora-Valdehueza (left), that I learned to play the piano at all and to love music . . . especially classical music, considering that I went to her school mainly to play with her son, Joe, and the other students!

It was only much, much later, though, that I fully appreciated how my piano lessons, with the guidance of a most gracious and patient teacher, had also helped me greatly in developing my thinking skills and learning self-discipline.

We are born with a preference for linear, logical and verbal or holistic, intuitive and non-verbal thinking. Brain development scientists have found that the left hemisphere of the brain does the former type of processing whereas the right hemisphere does the latter. This preference is manifested by which of our hands is more dominant. Since the left hemisphere of the brain communicates more with the right side of the body, being right-handed indicates to a large extent our preference for linear, logical, verbal processing. Being left-handed indicates that we think more holistically, intuitively and non-verbally. Many experts suggest that to exercise both hemispheres of the brain, and thus make it think more effectively in concert with each other, we should have activities that require using the left and right sides of the body.

Without realizing the far-reaching effect it was going to have for me, my mother gave me just the extra-curricular activity that was to stand me in good stead in my life - she had me take piano lessons. I still have vestigial memories of my left hand being stiff, awkward and opposed to any kind of command from my brain! But, through the relentless patience on the part of my teacher that resulted in many hours of practice on my part, the facility of using my left and right hands became automatic. Having to read notes, of course, only added to the mental exercise required in having piano lessons.

I am convinced that partly because I had to learn to play the piano, my thinking skills and the degree of discipline that I can muster are what they are now. And incalculable in its enhancing the quality of my life, the love of music was instilled in me.

Thank you, Mrs. Terry Zamora-Valdehueza, for the invaluable education and thank you, Joe, for the lifelong friendship.

Taken yesterday, Dec. 4, 2009, at Sentro 1859 Restaurant, Cagayan de Oro City, during the 87th Birthday Celebration of Mrs. Terry Zamora-Valdehueza. In the photo seated with me is Cichi Malferrari and at our backs are Joe Zamora Valdehueza, Orla Velez-Tablan and Ingrid Chavez-Agudo (former ZMS students), and Ingrid's children.

And there I was at 12 years old...with my playmates!

On Art and the Artist

Being the pack rat that I was (trying to no longer be one), I did an overhaul of a shelf that hardly ever sees the light of day - it's where I relegate stuff I want to keep for posterity and stuff I do not know what to do with yet. Imagine my delight when, during the overhaul, I found newspapers yellowed with age and one in particular where an article had my "old name" as the title!

To cover my bases, I called Ametta Suarez-Taguchi, columnist, playwright, artist, teacher, friend (to name a few of the many hats she wears) who wrote the said article to ask her permission for me to post it here. This article appeared in her Sari-sari column in the August 18, 1998 issue of Sun Star, Cagayan de Oro.

Though my name may have been the title, the article is mostly about attitudes toward art and artists.

Thank you, Ametta!

KHESSA LLUCH

by Ametta Suarez-Taguchi

Of all the personality types of the Eastern Enneagram (a system of classifying the nine personality types and their peculiar characteristics), the most withdrawn individual is Number Four. To this number belong inventors, artists, or "creators". Among this group, perhaps the loneliest and most distanced from society is the artist, especially in Third World countries where art is generally considered a wasteful luxury. As a former maid of mine who grew up in the biggest ghetto in Cebu once said, "Ang drawing, Undo, dili baya maka-on. Pag-elektroniks na lang, anak."

Though there are Filipinos who buy art works, let's face it, Narda was right: most of us would rather peg our savings toward purchasing a new karaoke, furniture or throwing a party.

Much worse off than the visual artist is the theatre person when he has not yet made a name for himself or belongs to a society that is not receptive to his brand of art. Unlike in England, the U.S.A. and other First World nations, in the Philippines nobody would line up at the box office to buy a ticket to a live stage performance. Instead, one has to sell tickets door-to-door in competition with Avon and Tupperware, or even exert mild pressure on the market by attaching a charitable cause to the motive of the dance drama, concert or play being mounted. The person you approach does not say aloud, "Ang theatre, Day, di maka-on" but just the same wonders quietly whether it's wiser to spend P100.00 to watch the play of an unknown playwright (or even Shakespeare for that matter!) which only lasts two hours than to spend the amount on a tube of lipstick which lasts two months.

"Hay, Inday, pag-Avon lady na lang," Narda would advise the theatre lover.

If one were to obey all the Nardas of the world, the artist would become an extinct animal, for even he who is as frugal as a Buddhist monk must earn money to buy his basic rice and kalamunggay. "Pues, mag-elektroniks siya," the Nardas would say, quite a reasonable advice actually, except that God has so designed the artist that he is completely inutile beyond his studio or stage. "Sus, di man magun-ob ang kalibutan kon wala ang artista ba," the Nardas would remark, adding, "pero ayaw lang intawon patya ang mga farmer, teacher, engineer, lawyer ug doctor."

It is the popular notion that the progress of the nation rests on the efforts of the farmer, the teacher, the engineer, the lawyer and the doctor. Usually forgotten in the equation is the artist. At best, he is considered the icing to the cake of progress; at worst, he is an eccentric pest you have to tolerate. Thus, a co-worker of mine told me to my face how pesky I am when he learned I dabble in play writing. "It's stupid to create a world that imitates life when there is so much of the real world to read about in the news. If I must buy something P100.00 and above, I'd rather buy a history book." I wish I were as fearless as the late Rolando Tinio whenever someone trivialized his work. During the performance of a play in which all the actors including him were required to be naked, the Assumptionistas in the audience began to giggle. Naked and with phallus dangling like a bat, he yelled, "PHILISTINES!"

In one column of his in the now-defunct The Globe, Tinio once wrote that we must rethink the idea that a poor nation does not need art, that it is the luxury of the rich. Citing Bertolt Brecht, he said that a nation becomes poor PRECISELY WHEN IT DOES NOT SUPPORT ART! If you examine the great civilizations of the world, you'd notice they all showcase a wealth of artworks out of the archaeological diggings and that in their time, the artists were a vital force in the mainstream of daily life, including the life of the poor.

How does a nation become poor when it does not support art? Coldness toward the artist is a symptom that the citizens cannot think beyond the needs of the body. This small-minded attitude disables them from viewing life from a higher vista and finding the best solutions to their problems. When people cease to use their imagination, they turn off the fuel needed to move forward and rise. To cite an example, why is America so rich and powerful? Because her leaders put a very high premium on creativity which is needed to operate a multi-dimensional system of solving a problem. Creativity is nurtured in all aspects of life but nowhere more obsessively than in the system of education. Our leaders in the Third World, on the other hand, encourage their constituents to rot in the dead-end of one-dimensional thinking.

If you consider that the artist is the person who opens your imagination and creativity, you would stop thinking of him as mere "icing." Instead, you would start valuing him as the very yeast of life.

Unfortunately, our government is not impressed by the thinking of Rolando Tinio. Yet someone must take up the cause of creative thinking and art for our nation to grow, and the best person to do the job when no one else cares is the teacher.

For this reason, I admire KHESSA LLUCH, former Corpus Christi teacher and now the directress of Lifetime Learning Center which is purely devoted to kindergarten education. Last Thursday, she brought her young students to view "Mga Babaeng Buhat," a Cebuano comedy which plays on weekends until September.

According to Khessa, "I want to inculcate an appreciation for art and, of course, creative thinking as early as possible because it is at this stage - at four-to-six years of age - that the person's values are fundamentally shaped. It is not enough to make the children draw, paint and sculpt with clay - they must also be introduced to the performing arts and make them see the behind-the-scenes underpinnings."

Thus, after curtain call, Khessa brought her pupils to the stage, introduced them to the cast and the crew and allowed them to examine the set, the lights and the sound system.

There were hilarious moments such as the remark of one child to Khessa, "Teacher, gibalhin nimo imong balay dinhi (the set resembles a real home)?"

Another child whose house is entirely airconditioned asked, "Asa ang aircon?"

A tot I accompanied to the "bathroom" of the "house" was surprised to find out that it did not have a working faucet. When I showed her that the door to a "bedroom" opened to the back of the stage, she giggled. "Puede butangan og tinuoray nga kuwarto?"

"Oo," I answered.

"Pero puede sab wala," she said. "Puede duyan?"

My God, at five, she was already exhibiting multi-dimensional, creative thinking!

May there be more Khessa to nurture such a potential!

That ends the article. Once again, thank you very much, Ametta!

Following are loose translations and notes from the above article:

"Ang drawing, Undo, dili baya maka-on. Pag-elektroniks na lang, anak."

"Undo, you cannot eat etchings. Might as well take up electronics, son."

"Sus, di man magun-ob ang kalibutan kon wala ang artista ba," . . . "pero ayaw lang intawon patya ang mga farmer, teacher, engineer, lawyer ug doctor."

"The world will not come to an end without the artist but please do not kill off the farmer, teacher, engineer, lawyer and doctor."

Mga Babaeng Buhat

Womankind

"Teacher, gibalhin nimo imong balay dinhi?"

"Teacher, you've moved your house here?"

"Asa ang aircon?"

"Where's the aircon?"

"Puede butangan og tinuoray nga kuwarto?" . . . "Pero puede sab wala," . . . "Puede duyan?"

"Can we put a real bedroom in there? Although, none is fine... Perhaps a hammock?"

Oo - Yes

For the inquiring minds: Khessa Lluch = Marissa Flores (for the full disclosure on how the names came to be, please go to: http://surrenderandwin.blogspot.com/2008/11/call-me-marissa.html)

The Rewards of Teaching and Parenting

Following is an email I got from the mother of a former student. With her permission, I'm posting it here.

This letter is especially gratifying for me because Nancy Rebollido-Patilano is also a very accomplished special education teacher working in New York. One of the things I admire about her is that when she comes to the Philippines, she very generously shares the techniques and strategies that she has learned in the many training programs that she has participated in as a teacher there.

As a parent myself, I cannot fault her in rejoicing in the accomplishments of her children. As unconditional as our love for our children might be, we cannot but take pride in what they are able to do exceptionally well. As we teachers are frequently reminded, and as parents also need to bear in mind, "Civilizations will only continue to progress when our children eventually know and accomplish more than we do. Conversely, civilization will inevitably stagnate and even deteriorate when we keep them from being better than we are."



The informal Kinder 1 class picture of Ean and her classmates (with Teacher Marissa, far left, and Teacher Luz, far right), SY 05-06.


Dear T. Marissa,

As promised I am sending you SOME of the pictures we keep to always remind us about Lifetime Study Center. Ean has her own album and she still remembers some of her classmates back then.

Ean is doing great in school. She is in 4th grade now in a top class here in Queens. She is with 29 other 4th graders and all of them are A students from different schools in 3rd grade. I was able to talk to her teacher during the Parent-Teacher Conference and we are very happy of her progress in school. The teacher commented that she is a reader in her own time with all kinds of genres. We always look back on how she was exposed to books in your school. A pat on your back, guys! Keep it up!

Last year, she represented her school for the Science Quiz all over Queens and made it to the finals where there were only three contestants left. Unfortunately, she did not make it, she was eliminated and rendered the 3rd place. The first and 2nd contestants are Indian immigrants. Boy, they are really smart! We thought she will feel bad but she was okay. She said being in the finals was already a big accomplishment. She loves Science and she is attending a Science Enrichment Program in school now.

All students start to take the NY State Tests for English Language Arts (Reading) and Math in 3rd grade. Last year, she started taking the two tests. I really sat down and reviewed with her, especially with ELA because English is her second language. Tests are 25 items and with two essay items, the tests have a time limit of 2 hours. She did very well. Her ELA test result was 98% - not bad for an immigrant. Her Math test was exceptionally high, she got 100% in Math. Only 17 of all 6,000+ 3rd graders in all of New York State got that score. We are so proud! I hope she will do the same this time. She is taking the tests on February 2010.

We are really supporting her with her studies. Sometimes it is really overwhelming to balance everything. Me and my husband are busy with work and my other daughter is also in first grade now. It is a tough and a challenging life raising girls in America. We are encouraging her to take music, learn to play an instrument or learn some sports to balance everything. She is still the Ean back in Lifetime - quiet - but she is beginning to come out of her shell. She has friends who come to our apartment at times. We are really asking God to give us guidance and with His grace we are doing great!

I am so proud to tell you these updates because you and Lifetime played a big part with how Ean is doing right now. As a teacher myself, I always love to hear about my students and touch base with them. We thank God that we have one school in CDO like Lifetime Study Center and, of course, people who are committed to building a brighter future. People like you!

Our everlasting thanks and hope to see you guys in July 2010!

With every good wish,

Nancy



Following are some of the attached photos of the email sent to me by Nancy. (Captions are mine.)

Resting their heads are Ean and Jasmin Yasay. Jasmin also now lives with her family in New York.

LSC Field Trip at Lumbia Airport: With Ean in this picture, prior to boarding a plane, is Kikay Beja, who now lives in LA.

Singing "The Lord's Prayer," Christmas Program '04: In this picture with Ean are two other classmates who are also now on the other side of the globe: Mykah Absuelo, the girl at the center looking left, is in New York and Cheska Juliano, the girl with three fingers up, is in Canada.

Postscript: I hadn't realized that quite a few of my students in this class have migrated until I saw these pictures. Thank you so much, Nancy, for emailing these pictures and rekindling the memories.

A Tree's Birthday

Last Oct. 3, some friends, my grandson and I went to a farm in Bukidnon to attack the durians and rambutans there. They were scrumptious!

We were also witness to the "birth" of a bottlebrush tree. To commemorate the planting of the sapling, we posed with it. We are hoping that many years from now, we'll still be partaking of the bounty of this piece of land and also marvel at how this sapling has grown into a very sturdy, lush tree.

The Exuberance of Children

Being a teacher has truly been a blessing.

As children, my playmates and I would play school during weekends or on school breaks, among other childhood games, of course. And yet, I don't ever recall wanting to be a teacher when I grew up.

Now, I've been a teacher for 25 years and, in fact, some of my preschool students from long ago have children of their own. It is gratifying to know that I've been a part of many, many young lives and, hopefully, made a positive contribution to their growth as human beings.

Above is a photo taken earlier this afternoon when I was at St. Mary's School here in Cagayan de Oro. I've just finished judging their elocution contests for Grades 1, 2 and 3 and on my way out, I was happily mobbed by former students who now study there :-)

A Wonderful Filipino Tradition

It is only now that I have a little over half a century's worth of living that I am truly appreciating what a wonderful gift having an extended family is.

Above is a photo of a meeting of some of my Maestrado relatives last Oct. 2, 2009 at Cagayan de Oro City. The objective of the meeting was to, hopefully, get to know as many of our relatives for us to be able to work together and organize a grand reunion in the near future.

Ladies and Gentlemen

Above: Some of the members of the Macajalar Bay Toastmasters Club and visiting toastmasters from other clubs...ladies and gentlemen all dressed up to celebrate the victory and glamour in their lives. Venue: VIP Hotel, Cagayan de Oro City, Feb. 18, 2009.

Steps to Serenity

(This speech was given as Basic Speech Project #3 of Toastmasters International at the Macajalar Bay Toastmasters Club, VIP Hotel, Cagayan de Oro City, Feb. 18, 2009.)

God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; the courage to change the things I can; and the wisdom to know the difference.

Ladies and gentlemen, guests, good evening.

Across the globe, 12 Step meetings start with that prayer. I've attended many such meetings as I have belonged to an Al-Anon Family Group since 1995.

The main tools of the Al-Anon program, a support group for relatives and friends of alcoholics, are the 12 Steps, adapted from Alcoholics Anonymous, also known as AA.  This organization, founded in 1935, is where countless alcoholics have found sobriety through working the steps. Because of their proven power and worth, these 12 suggested steps have also been adapted by numerous other programs such as Narcotics Anonymous, Gamblers Anonymous, Overeaters Anonymous, to name but a few.

Meetings are the main venue for learning the steps and there are guidelines to ensure that the greatest number will benefit from the meetings.

What are the 12 Steps?

To encapsulate what could take years to fully comprehend and practice consistently, the 12 Steps are sequential actions that we may have to do over again and again in order to live a serene and joyful life. 

The first 3 steps help us to have a truly personal relationship with a Higher Power. This relationship gives us the strength to look deep within ourselves with rigorous honesty and face life courageously. 

Steps 4 through 10 involves a thorough self-examination of our strengths and weaknesses and where making amends might be order. 

Steps 11 and 12 ensure that after we have done the initial clean up of the wreckage from our past, we continually clean house so that we are protected from going back to the chaos which, in the first place, was what brought us down to our knees.

When members share their experience, strength and hope in working the program, the multifaceted aspects of the 12 steps are revealed. On a given night, for example, if the topic is Step 1 - we admitted we are powerless and that our lives have become unmanageable - members may start by sharing what experiences have led them to the oftentimes unpalatable realization that no matter what they do, still their lives keep spiralling downward uncontrollably and move on to how they are working through that realization by utilizing Step 1.

As you can imagine, exposing personal vulnerabilities can be very scary which is why anonymity is a basic foundation of the program and why there is a "No Crosstalk" policy.

Anonymity is emphasized at the start of every meeting with the reminder: "Whom you see here, what you hear here, let it stay here." When confidentiality is assured, members can share more freely and thus benefit more from attending meetings.

And crosstalk?

Basically, crosstalk is interrupting another speaker to give advice, criticize, argue, augment or diminish what has been said.

In meetings, healing experiences depend on mutual respect of boundaries. Letting individual members have the floor exclusively, without interruption, for the length of their sharing can be the most respectful of boundaries members can accord each other. Additionally, members are exhorted to keep the focus on themselves only and limit responses to relating their own experiences with similar situations.

Advice which is not requested is often perceived as a veiled criticism and in these groups, acceptance is what most members need. Too often, feelings of rejection have been a constant companion in the past and, in fact, may still be in the present. Therefore, the group strives to be a safe environment where members can share their pain and their progress as they find their own solutions by working the program without fear of being judged.

It took me a long time to hold my tongue in meetings. It was through self-observation that I found I had the tendency to wrest attention by giving one and all a piece of my mind. How I wish I could say that I've been unflinching in this self-observation but I can't. There were many a time when I would wince at the realization that my almost non-stop "sharing" was itself an indication that I needed other people to acknowledge, and thereby validate, my existence thus revealing to me how fragile my sense of self-worth actually was.

Gradually, though, through almost 14 years of attending 12 Step meetings, I learned not to counsel but rather to just give an ear and a shoulder to cry on, if that was what was needed, so that my fellow travellers on the road to recovery will be self-empowered.

I learned that I wasn't God's gift to humankind and so curbed my tendencies to control and manipulate people and events.

Most of all, I've learned to listen. Now, when I catch myself interrupting someone or attempting to hijack a conversation, I abort that incipient relapse into old dysfunctional behaviors by keeping an eye on that guidepost that warns, "No crosstalk".

12 Step meetings, with its nurturing environment, was where I learned a lot of these skills and resolved many of my issues.

If you believe that you need the serenity to accept the things that are beyond your power to change, the courage to change what you can, no matter how inconvenient or difficult, and the wisdom to know which response is best, 12-Step meetings may be what could lead you to the attainment of those qualities and the quality of life they promise.

ADD

(The following was my speech project #2 with the objective of "organize your speech" for Toastmasters. Given Dec. 17, 2008, VIP Hotel, Cagayan de Oro City)

Thoughtlessness, disorganization, procrastination...these three character defects, when exhibited by a person, may be indications that this person has attention deficit disorder.

Fellow Toastmasters, guests, good evening!

Tonight, I'd like to share with you how attention deficit disorder or ADD has played a role in my life and in the telling, I hope that I will be able to give you insights into how ADD can affect a person and maybe, just maybe, even let you realize that you yourself or a person you know may also have ADD.

Let me elaborate on these three character defects that used to plague me.

At the top of this list is thoughtlessness.
I had the unfortunate habit of thinking about many things at the same time that in the midst of a conversation with someone, I would suddenly call out to someone else to do this or to take care of that. My children had often said to me, "Mommy, please let me finish! You never listen!"

I have accepted that multitasking in this manner is thoughtlessness. It had given people I talked with the impression that they were not important enough to have my full attention. It had kept me from really listening to other people such that I had missed out on really getting to know them better. But, more importantly, it had driven a wedge between me and the people I love.

Second on my list is disorganization which can, occasionally, still be perceived in the way I speak. Of course, if you asked me then, I would have averred most vehemently that there was a rhyme and rhythm to the way I thought and spoke. Yet, listening to myself through the ears of others, I'd been made painfully aware that I can start to say something, think of something else, stop midway, start on another thought, backtrack, finish a thought started many elliptical sentences ago...even I got my own head spinning.

Also, athough alleviated somewhat from a ruthless commitment to be less disorganized, nevertheless, my ADD can still be observed through how I go from project to project. Some of my hobbies include cross stitching and solving jigsaw puzzles. Of course, as a teacher, I also make visual materials for my classes. Well, I start on a project, I get into the flow... and then - wham! - something else catches my attention and off I go. Before I know it, I'm into the flow of an entirely different activity. Add 5 or more other diversions and you get the picture of surfaces holding the dregs of projects yet to be completed.

Which leads me to the third character defect on my list: procrastination.
The frequency may have lessened to a certain extent now, but there was a time when I would get so distracted and diverted that I would get swamped with obligations and responsibilities that cannot be put off anymore because they have become very urgent. Making lesson plans, checking test papers, computing grades are not high on my list of fun things to do and that is why they are the frequent victims of my procrastination.

Guilt. Fear. Migraines. Hyperacidity. Hypertension. They are but a few of the price I pay for procrastinating.

Realizing that thoughtlessness, disorganization and procrastination are not in my best interest and despite the fact that I can blame them on having ADD, I have made a concerted effort to minimize their negative impact in my life and those around me.

Presence of mind has proven to be a very effective weapon against these character defects in my life. Mindfulness has allowed me not to give in to my tendency to think about too many things at the same time which, in the past, has led to thoughtlessness. Reminders of my life goals and doing first things first are keeping me from being disorganized and, as a consequence, has eliminated procrastination.

We may have afflictions such as attention deficit disorder and they may wreak havoc with our lives but with self-awareness, a firm commitment to self-improvement, a healthy dose of moral support from those around us, and medical help, if need be, we can clean up our act so that we can be present to the only life that really matters. This one. Right now.

Here's wishing you all a stress-free Christmas and let's resolve to meet the New Year more thoughtful, organized and punctual!